Friday, December 24, 2010

Merry Clerihew!

Well, that was the clerihew year that was: so many sparkling moments, so many of the world's movers and shakers and other sodomites reduced to four lines of nonsense poetry.

The little dog barked to see such fun, indeed. And quite right too.

May your cow jump over your moon and your dish run away with your spoon.

Merry Clerihew Christmas and a Happy Clerihew-less new year.

George Dubya Bush
And his cheerleader tush.
In the Skull & Bones Den
Was all things to all men.

Dick Cheney
Eany-meany brainy.
Best wishes of long life and health
Somehow come out as "Go fuck yourself!"

Osama Bin Laden's
Statue, Kew Gardens.
A quiet public thanking
From a grateful Global Banking.

He has more of those Armani glasses
Than could be pushed up four grown men's arses.

Little Johnny Howard
Over midgets towered.
His motto as sidekick hick:
"I speaks oftly and carry a pig's dick."

David Sassoon
Was wont to dragoon
HM's navy, under Admiral Winchup,
As thugs to smack his chink bitch up.

Joan of Arc
Burned in the dark.
Sexy bovver bitch
With legs by Milla Jovovich.


Edo said...

Happy Crimbo Nobby!
Got my own little selection box of seasonal smokes, and will spare a thought for you when I'm wrapping one up.

Anonymous said...

prepare for a holiday terror attack
holly catfish, what the frak
al qaeda is now a thing of the past
we have a newie run up the mast

domestic terror is now a threat
look sideways we'll shoot you, you bet
reduce the people is the thing to be done
taking you out, one by one

oh wonderful new world order please save my soul
by taking me to heaven to join the roll
to be sorted by god into evil and pure
and make room on earth for the chosen fewer

A. Peasant said...

nobs a good mate
and a nasty pirate i bet
and i wish him a merry christmas
whether he likes it or not
xo and that's that.

pfft a shitty clericew no doubt but who is grading these things anyway. that's what i always say.

Peter said...

I'm yo momma
I'm yo daddy
I'm dat nigga in da alley
I'm yo pussha man

hehe after hearing this song today I thought of you
got get mellow now

Peter said...

scintillating stoner film

Penny said...

Happy New Year Nobody!

Dave Q. said...

Barack Hussein Obama
The sound, in some, evokes trauma
But as yet no proof of Sin turns
To the porking of his interns

(Happy New Year, Nobby, which is already in progress on your side of the planet--I have to wait a bit yet)

Dave Q.

john said...

Bloody hell nobody, the flooding looks really vast in Queensland. Hope all's ok with you.

kikz said...

well, thought i'd left a mgs on the previous post..??


hope the floods have left you dry noby....

happy new yr..


Anonymous said...

That flooding looks bad.

- Aangirfan

Anonymous said...

Happy New Year Nobody. Thanks to you I can no longer watch any of em on the telly without feeling ill. Thats a good thing and a nasty reality.

What do suggest we do about it Nobby, anyone?

That aside thanks for a good laugh at our sinister reality.

Dave Q. said...

Hello, Nobody.

I'm sure that I am not alone in my concern for your safety and well-being, during this latest disaster in your neck of the woods.

Best wishes, truly.

Dave Q.

Anonymous said...

Hello Mister Nobby I thought I'd drop in and let you know I'm looking after my constituents in this time of need.
You may notice that I'd make a good treasurer the way I handle math.
Have a good one.
Your favourite ex

nobody said...

Hullo Boys and Girls,

I'm back now, which is to say the grass ran out and I'm now back on the wagon. And thank God for that.

As for floods, Tourist Town where I live is on the coast, a couple of hours from Brisbane. Beaches don't flood you know. Mind you, it did rain a lot here until everything smelt mouldy all the time but the floods were elsewhere.

Otherwise, I expect I'll be weird and grumpy for a while as I go through withdrawal symptoms but soon enough things will be back to normal (not that that's quite the right word, but whatever...)

Off to yoga,