Saturday, August 15, 2009

"Hands up for the Jewish boy"

In a Python frame of mind, I went a bit silly over at Craig Murray's. Apropos him discussing Al Qaeda in terms of its media described nature, I pointed out a few oxymoronic facts about Al Qaeda and finally wondered at the fact that it's number three big banana is a Jewish boy from Orange County called Adam Pearlman.


Imagined Al Qaeda board meeting to discuss whom to move into the number three slot -

'How about this Jewish boy Adam Pearlman?'
'What can you tell us about him?'
'Well he's Jewish for starters. I mean really Jewish, his grandfather was head of the ADL. Hmm ...very young ...recent convert ...no experience ...liked satanic heavy metal music. Um wait, it seems he's engaged in attacks on American people.'
'Well that sounds promising.'
'Oh wait, it was Muslims. He got arrested for beating up Muslims outside some Mosques in California.'
'What about finance experience? Military experience? A wealth of contacts in the Muslim world?'
'Nope, not a sausage.'
'Bloody hell! Are there any pluses at all?'
'Well, he's very enthusiastic. And he says he hates Americans for their freedoms.'
'Does he? I have to be honest and say I never got that one.'
'Me neither. Actually it's one of Bush's but you've got to admit it's kind of catchy.'
'Hmm... he's not a spook is he?'
'I asked him that and he said that he wasn't.'
'Okay then.'
'Look, never mind all that - he's the only one who applied for the job.'
'Bloody Muslims! Here we are trying to institute Sharia law and none of them will be in it! Hell, let's give the job to the Jewish boy - at least he's keen! Hands up for the Jewish boy. All agreed then!'
at

9 comments:

  1. AnonymousAugust 16, 2009 at 8:05 PM

    From Belgium

    Shame on you Mr N for trashing that nice Mr Rupert in one post and then relying on him for support in another. Sir, you are a blackguard and a scoundrel!
    Although I can’t fault what you said ;-)

    ReplyDelete
  2. jamesAugust 17, 2009 at 11:55 AM

    That's funny, Nobody. It's also very Pythonesque, as you say. Which means it's very close to the truth and that is what makes it funny (and powerful). Have I come full circle yet?

    I read once that many comedians (Python crew included) choose comedy as a way of surviving the insanity that passes for reality around us. And great comedy shows up our social reality for it's insanity.

    The laughter is a way of releasing the pent up tension caused by the lunacy and so it gives us relief and renews our energy to carry on in spite of it all.
    So, thanks.

    ReplyDelete
  3. PennyAugust 18, 2009 at 4:48 AM

    hey nobody, I thought Adam Ghadan had moved on and there was a new Jewish Alquadea leader, I think I had heard that somewhere...

    Can't recall.

    ReplyDelete
  4. nobodyAugust 18, 2009 at 3:20 PM

    Hey Pen, last I heard he'd actually come out and said that yes, he was Jewish but he's not anymore, or somesuch guff.

    But really who gives a shit what he says? All the lipstick in the world can't dress up that pig of a story.

    There's only one conclusion you can come to - Al Qaeda is bullshit. There is no spin that can be put on the fact that Al Qaeda's number three is Jewish that will give a non-oxymoronic result.

    Thanks James. And FB, what, you only just figured it out? Or perhaps this isn't common knowledge? Just for the record, anyone reading here would be well served keeping in mind that I am a blackguard and a scoundrel. In fact, you shouldn't believe a word I say, this bit included, ha ha.

    ReplyDelete
  5. gallier2August 18, 2009 at 5:54 PM

    Penny is right, as Adam Gadahn has been exposed since a long time (at least since 2004), they try to flog another "convert" as a bad bad bad bad toilet bowl, sorry I meant al qaida. His name is Yousef al-Khattab.

    ReplyDelete
  6. slozoAugust 19, 2009 at 2:16 PM

    WRH followed your story, Nobody, with a link to a utube video detailing Adam Pearlman's exploits as disinformation artist and agent provocateur and his understudy - Yousef Al-Khattab. Or, Joseph Cohen, renegade jew, take your pick.

    You really can't make this stuff up, can you?

    Al Quaida number 1, 2, 3, 4, who here wants to start a war? USA! USA!

    Amazing how cohesive this organisation al kaida is . . . so many top guys taken down over the years, over and over again, and yet they still have skills to continue fighting the US, bogging down the most all-powerful empire since the British! Phenomenal stuff, really . . . they should get into business training, they have a business model that never quits no matter the pressures exerted!

    Funny stuff Nobody, but seriously - it'd never work.

    Nobody would believe it ;)

    ReplyDelete
  7. nobodyAugust 19, 2009 at 3:56 PM

    Onya folks. Yousef al-Khattab, eh? Is his name really Cohen?

    Ha! I just looked it up. Unbelievable. Everything anyone needs to know about Al Qaeda can be summed up with the fact that their senior spokesmen are Jewish. Honestly.

    ReplyDelete
  8. AnonymousJanuary 24, 2011 at 10:33 PM

    Thanks for that.

    - aangirfan

    ReplyDelete
  9. nobodyJanuary 25, 2011 at 10:41 AM

    E niente.

    ReplyDelete

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